The name my People gave me, Albert, is one I share with several humans—among them various monarchs and a genius. I consider it a highly dignified and thus suitable moniker.

Yet, having chosen such an appropriate name, my People and other humans I know can’t resist saddling me with more than a dozen additional nicknames. Some of these really show considerable lack of respect, I must say. But what is a dog to do? The names they choose to call me probably say more about them than me.

A question for my fellow domesticated animals and their people: How many nicknames do you have? Do certain humans have a special name for you that only they use? Let me know in the comments.

A reminder: Have you deduced the name of my houseguest yet? Entries will be accepted by e-mail until 10 PM EST on Monday the 22nd.